This week has been a very emotional week for me. (and no, it's not because i'm crying out for sugar and gluten..ha ha..the detox is going fine.)
The reason why, is because my son has spent several nights this week at prairie camp. No big deal, right? wrong. Imagine the feeling (and some of you know it firsthand, you don't have to imagine) of carrying a child inside you for 41 long weeks. 41 weeks of pain and sickness. All worth every single bit. Then, that child, needing you. For EVERYTHING. Now, i'm watching that child DESIRE and WANT& thrive during special times away from me. I'm watching him WANT to grow closer to the Lord and make new friends and be his own person. I am so unbelievably proud of Owen. The selfish mom in me is yelling "NO YOU CANT GO TO CAMP! I MISS YOU, AND ITS TOO HARD!" Instead, i'm encouraging him, and telling him how proud I am of him and his beautiful heart. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but it has been a revolutionary week for me in the way that I see my not so little boy.
Walking by his room several nights this week to see his empty bed, has been eye opening. This life is truly flying. Sometimes i long to re-do it all. I'd redo that awful pregnancy, to experience and love it again and again. Meanwhile, I'm praying to GOD that I can be the mother that this thriving boy needs me to be.
:)
My ramble for the week.
The reason why, is because my son has spent several nights this week at prairie camp. No big deal, right? wrong. Imagine the feeling (and some of you know it firsthand, you don't have to imagine) of carrying a child inside you for 41 long weeks. 41 weeks of pain and sickness. All worth every single bit. Then, that child, needing you. For EVERYTHING. Now, i'm watching that child DESIRE and WANT& thrive during special times away from me. I'm watching him WANT to grow closer to the Lord and make new friends and be his own person. I am so unbelievably proud of Owen. The selfish mom in me is yelling "NO YOU CANT GO TO CAMP! I MISS YOU, AND ITS TOO HARD!" Instead, i'm encouraging him, and telling him how proud I am of him and his beautiful heart. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but it has been a revolutionary week for me in the way that I see my not so little boy.
Walking by his room several nights this week to see his empty bed, has been eye opening. This life is truly flying. Sometimes i long to re-do it all. I'd redo that awful pregnancy, to experience and love it again and again. Meanwhile, I'm praying to GOD that I can be the mother that this thriving boy needs me to be.
(happily eating french toast at Grammy and Pappy's cabin)
:)
My ramble for the week.
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