That is the word I would use to describe the current struggle with Owen. Goodness it's hard!! Hard to remain calm when your little one is talking back to you. Hard to know what to do when you've exhausted all your options.
Here's a dialogue that happens between Owen and I today as I'm picking up Cora from babysitters:
Me: "Okay Owen, it's time to pick up the toys, we've got to go."
Owen: "Um, no. I'm not going to do that."
Me: "I will ask you once more. You need to pick up the toys, it is time to go. If you don't obey, you will loose your book" (he gets a book and a song before nap)
Owen: "No. YOU will loose YOUR book."
Me: "You have now lost your book, you need to pick up the toys NOW."
Owen: "No."
Me: "You have lost your book, and your song, and you will be sitting in time out when we get home"
Owen: "No, i didn't loose my book."
and...i think you get the picture.
It's so hard!! I mean, parents...what do I do?? I prefer not to spank (although i'll do what i have to do) and taking away privileges and sitting in time out are things that during this instance, he didn't give a rip.
this kid is smart. I'm mostly blown away when he talks to me like that!! It's hard to even know how to respond!!
Here's a dialogue that happens between Owen and I today as I'm picking up Cora from babysitters:
Me: "Okay Owen, it's time to pick up the toys, we've got to go."
Owen: "Um, no. I'm not going to do that."
Me: "I will ask you once more. You need to pick up the toys, it is time to go. If you don't obey, you will loose your book" (he gets a book and a song before nap)
Owen: "No. YOU will loose YOUR book."
Me: "You have now lost your book, you need to pick up the toys NOW."
Owen: "No."
Me: "You have lost your book, and your song, and you will be sitting in time out when we get home"
Owen: "No, i didn't loose my book."
and...i think you get the picture.
It's so hard!! I mean, parents...what do I do?? I prefer not to spank (although i'll do what i have to do) and taking away privileges and sitting in time out are things that during this instance, he didn't give a rip.
this kid is smart. I'm mostly blown away when he talks to me like that!! It's hard to even know how to respond!!
3 comments:
Next time try to give him small choices..."Do you want to put away the cars or the trains first?" ""Do you want to make your bed or pick up the clothes first?"
Instead of barking orders, when we give kids choices, they feel empowered and thrive on our ability to help them make good decisions.
(Read Loving Our Kids on Purpose by Danny Silk. It's awesome.)
thank you Kate!!! Great Advice. I forget that sometimes when i'm flustered. I should read that!
Read this exchange again, after you've had enough sleep and a good cup of coffee. "No..YOU will lose YOUR book!" Ha. I laughed out loud. This kid is smart, and I think often times, for toddlers at least, it makes them a little more naughty. I have no advice for how to make him listen, in fact, I will follow these commets to see if you get any good advice. Just know you're not alone, everyone's kid is naughty, and everyone is trying to figure out how to fix it. Even those "perfect moms" have moments at home when they yell "GO TO YOUR ROOM!" because they have no idea what else to do.
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